Okay, Movember is coming, and you want to grow a Mo’ and not just any Mo’ this is your first Mo’. But where do you start? How do you approach the task, respecting the notion that you are about to put your masculinity on show for the world to see?
Here are the 5 steps to growing a successful ‘Stache.
Step 1 – When in doubt – try it out!
This question could be the most important part of the journey. The last thing you want is to gee up all of your friends and family to sponsor you. Then, come the end of November; you have the facial fur of a prepubescent schoolboy. People will want their money back! May I suggest a trial run in September or October, but only for a few days – you don’t want to ruin the November surprise thereby losing valuable sponsors and the impact of this lip challenge.
Step 2 – Get Mo-tivated: essential viewing inspiration
The next step is to channel some ‘mo’tivation’ as the growing month is a hard one.
Download and watch ‘Chopper’ and ‘Smokey and the Bandit’ to get an understanding of the street cred a moustache can have. Think Fu Man Chu, The Zappa, The Chevron, The Walrus or classic old school Mutton Chops. But whatever you choose – just don’t do the Zorro pencil mo’! Hardly an impressive level on the manometer.
Have a goal. Failing to do this and you’ll no doubt find yourself wanting to cover up every mirror in the house to avoid dealing with the changing stages of furriness. You have to be one with the moustache.
Step 3 – Adopt a selective contact approach
A major factor in growing a successful Movember Mo’ is the selfless act of taking on a ‘heavy petting hiatus’. Any negative feedback during the growing stages could be detrimental to the survival of your upper lip foliage.
Don’t brush over this lightly and underestimate the seriousness of this stage. A simple hello peck from mum could be the start of the demise, leaving your Mouth Mirkin feeling follically challenged and pressured to vacate.
Step 4 – Get grooming
One of the final processes here to ensure a long lasting lustrous lip rug is grooming. You must preen that bad boy and have it looking as smooth as the pelt of a sea otter. As it gathers length, trim the stragglers, pluck your greys and remember that keeping it neat and tailored and free of lost foodstuffs are definite ways of avoiding the negative banter. Winning!
Step 5 – Get personal: befriend those bristles
So we come to our final step and like all things that you become fond of, your ‘stache should have a term of endearment (or many). Just like anything you grow to love, it deserves respect. We took the time to research some names to get you started: Muzzy, The Love Tickler, Flavour Saver, Cookie Duster, Snot Mop, Mulligrub, Grass Grin, Face Lace or timeless classics such as Señor Handlebars, Facial Fur and The Crumb Catcher.